Should You Keep Your Kid Out of Kindergarten?
In a recent article in the New York Times, Pamela Paul tacked the touchy topic of whether parents should wait a year to put their kids in kindergarten.
This is a tough topic with many pros and cons. Delaying kindergarten a year gives kids more time to develop fine motor skills needed for reading, writing, and holding still for 8 hours a day, however, on the other hand there are social ramifications of your child being a year-and-a-half younger than their peers. Read more
How a Mini-trampoline and the Beegees Saved the Day
A bit of random ramblings from a day my life…
Sanity Hero #1
Yesterday was my 4-year-old’s first day of preschool (we did preschool last year so I wasn’t too teared up sending him off with his new school clothes and backpack looking WAY more grown up than he did when I tucked him in last night … excuse me while I grab a tissue…)
Okay, I’m better now – back to the story.
For the past week the kids and I have had cold. A stuffy sinus head cold to be precise. Definitely NOT one of my favorite things! Since I’ve been feeling a it like last week’s garbage, I haven’t been exercising. Yesterday I really started to feel it! I felt grumpier than a kicked badger and couldn’t figure out what was going on. Then it hit me that I haven’t even gone for a walk the past week. 
[ Read more
Raising Kids: How Do You Keep Your Cool?
Check Out This Article
I just read a news article from the Onion (check this quick and humorous article out) about another mom who has learned the value of taking time for herself.
You know, sometimes when we get overwhelmed as parents our response may not always be the best. I’ve found in those instances, when I take a moment to myself I am SO much better equipped to handly the situation with love and patience rather than irritation and snippiness (yes, I just made that word up).
Why Saying Nothing can be More Effective Than Saying Something
Ever heard the phrase “Silence is golden?” Well, it can be golden in more ways than one. In some situations (especially those when you feel like you are going to lose your cool), silence can convey a message more effectively than a whole dictionary of words.
60 Second Strategies:
So in those moments when you are about to start ripping your hair out by the handful and let loose a stream of words you might regret later, try silence on for size. Go lock your door for a minute. Take a couple of deep breaths, remind yourself of all the things you have to be grateful for, and see how much better you feel.
Then you will be ready to return to your family and be the amazing parent you want to be.
Mom! Go Sit in Time-Out!
Parents Need Time-Outs, Too
The other day was just “one of those days.” You know the kind? The kids were wound tighter than a spool of thread, they had WAY too much rambunctious energy to be safely contained within four walls and before you could even say “peanut-butter sandwich” things just started to melt down.
I hastily slapped some sandwiches together and tossed a couple of apples in the bag and exited stage left to expend some of this energy at a nearby park (one of our favorite diversions).
In spite of playing hard outside all morning, my kids still were a bit on the cantankerous side. By the end of the day, I was just spent! I needed a time out! Read more
Tantrum Taming 101
Tantrums can be FUN!
As a mom of two little boys (2 and 4 years), I’ve had my fair share of experiences dealing with the inevitable tantrum.
For people who are so small, it can be downright impressive to see the sheer magnitude of the tantrums they can display. I mean really, you have to give them credit where credit is due!
However impressive the tantrum may be, it generally isn’t a desired behavior for the parent, especially if you just spent an hour and a half at the grocery store loading your cart to near overflowing (because shopping with kids isn’t something you care to repeat every day) and you are trying to bag your groceries and keep a wailing child out of the path of other shoppers. Read more
Building Your Child’s Self-Esteem by Living in the Now
“Now is a gift, that is why it’s called the present.”
Have you ever had your kids look at you impatiently and roll their eyes and say, “C’mon! Live in the NOW!”?
Did you know that behind the sassy-ness, there is actually wisdom in those words? Think about it for a minute. All we really have is right now in this very moment. You don’t have yesterday, you don’t have tomorrow, you don’t even have 5 minutes ago. It’s all right now. Read more
How to Build Self-Esteem in Your Kids: Part 4
“I am afraid to show you who I really am,
because if I show you who I really am,
you might not like it–and that’s all I got.”
~Sabrina Ward Harrison
The Third Step in Building Self-Esteem in Your Kids: Your Child is Not His Actions
This is one trap that is very easy to fall into. Let’s say your daughter brought home her math test from school with a big red F on it. Does this make her a failure? What if your son totally dropped the ball (literally and figuratively) at the football game last night? Does this make him a failure doomed to a lifetime of nothing but failure?
No, it certainly doesn’t. It just reflects the level they are performing at in that particular moment in time. It has no indication on future performance or potential.
A Child is a Person Who Acts
A child isn’t their actions, they are just little people who are acting. These actions create reactions, or results. We are in complete control of whether we deem these results as good or bad. It really is your choice. As you learn to see your “results” as just feedback and an opportunity to learn and grow, all results become good. Mistakes are a chance to learn and grow.
If you excessively punish a child for their “results” you remove the learning opportunity that will benefit them for a lifetime. Punishment may correct the behavior, but the child is acting out of fear rather than a deeper understanding of cause and effect.
Now let’s make it absolutely clear that I’m not saying that there should be no consequences. There absolutely should be consequences – both good and bad – for deserving actions. What I am saying is that we should give our kids the opportunity to learn from their mistakes and help them through the process. Read more
How to Build Self-Esteem in Your Kids: Part 2
“You must love yourself before you love another.
By accepting yourself and fully being what you are,
your simple presence can make others happy.”
The First Step In Building Self-Esteem in Your Kids: Laying the Foundation
Do you know how the Great Wall of China was built? One brick at a time. Yep, this enormous wall, one of the only man-made structures visible from space, was laid one brick at a time.
Your child’s self-esteem is built in much the same manner: one piece at a time. Let’s take a look at this first piece.
Ever Feel Like You’re Being Watched?
One of the most powerful things I’ve learned raising children is that they are learning from you, all the time. They take no breaks. They take no vacations. They are always watching, always learning, whether you want them to or not. It is the way God designed children, and there is an excellent reason for that design.
Your children are watching you instintively, learning on so many levels, because they are preparing themselves to live on their own in the great big world. Like animals in the wild learn from their parents how to get food, find shelter, what dangers to avoid, etc your children are undergoing the same learning process.
- They are learning about human relationships.
- They are learning about how to care for their bodies.
- They are learning what is safe and unsafe.
- They are learning how to treat others.
- They are learning how to treat themselves…
All of this, just by watching you. You are laying the foundation for your child’s life in your everyday activities. We are going to focus on the last in this list in this post – they are learning how to treat themselves. How are they learning this? By watching the way you treat yourself.
Principle #1 in Building Self-Esteem:
Do Unto Yourself As You Would Have Your Children Do Unto Themselves
Action speak louder than words, right? One of the best lessons you can teach you children is to model self-respect.
Notice how you treat yourself.
- Do you berate yourself when you knock over a glass of milk? “I’m so clumsy”
- Have words like, “Man, how could I have been so stupid!” when you forgot to bring back the overdue library books when you set out on your errands?
- How about this one, “I am so fat!” when you are trying on clothes at the store.
It might not always be this blunt. And it doesn’t even have to be out loud. Your kids pick up on your emotions caused by your thoughts. Sound crazy?
Have you ever walked up to a friend and just known when they were sad or upset? Your kids can do that too, they are even better at it than adults are.
Kids can feel when you are upset. They can sense that you are being less than kind to yourself and they are storing that in their minds that, “Oh, this is how I’m supposed to act as well.”
60 Second Tip: Model Self-Respect
First, I want to make sure you are aware of this fact – You are a divine being. You are made in the Image of God and you are here for a purpose. You have unique gifts and talents and the world is a better place because you are in it.
Now that we have that out in the open, live it! Do you think God ever berates Himself? I think that is highly unlikely.
One of the best ways to show God gratitude and respect is to love and respect yourself. You are, after all, one of His highest creations.
How do you do this?
- Be kind to yourself
- Forgive yourself for past mistakes
- Be patient with yourself as you make more mistakes These are just learning opportunities if you choose to see them that way.
- Respect your body Make healthy food choices. Get out and exercise and enjoy this incredible world we live in. You don’t have to start running marathons, just get out and go for a walk. Go to a park. Get out into nature.
- Learn to really love yourself I’m not talking about arrogance or conceit. I’m talking about developing a good, healthy sense of love for yourself. You are an incredible being with unlimited potential! That alone deserves a healthy dose of love and respect!
This may sound like an overly simple concept. But don’t let that deceive you. Loving yourself is the most important thing you can do for you children.
Remember, kids can spot a phony from a mile away. If you tell them to love themselves while you despise yourself, they will see right through you and the lesson will be lost.
So take 60 Seconds today and show yourself love. Say it out loud! Write a love note and post it on your mirror. Read it out loud everytime you walk past it.
I’d like to end with the quote from the top of this post…
“You must love yourself before you love another.
By accepting yourself and fully being what you are,
your simple presence can make others happy.”
Follow this quote and loving yourself, you will make you children happy just by being around them. You will be teaching them one of the most important principles of developing a rock-solid self-esteem!
How to Build Self-Esteem in Your Kids: Part 1
“Parents need to fill a child’s bucket of self-esteem
so high that the rest of the world can’t poke
enough holes to drain it dry.” ~Alvin Price
Why do You Need to Pay Attention to This Post?
Whether the kids are excited for this or not, the new school year is just around the corner. While children learn many wonderful things at school, they are also often exposed to other kids, teachers, and situations that can greatly impact their lives – and not always for the better!
It is vital that your kids’ “self-esteem bucket” is filled to overflowing so they can withstand the turbulence of childhood.
What is Self-Esteem, Anyway?
In a nutshell, self-esteem is the opinion you have of yourself. This can be good or it can be bad. We form this internal opinion from feedback from external sources – our parents, friends, teachers, and other people who influence our lives.
Why is Self-Esteem So Important?
Self-esteem is our perception of ourselves and our own self-worth. Read more
Positive Parenting Recommends: Inspirational Children’s Book “How Big is God”
How Do You Explain God to a Child?
We picked up another great find at the library the other day (I just love the library)! I loved this book so much I had to order a copy for our own library.
The book is “How Big is God?” by Lisa Tawn Bergren and was illustrated by Laura J. Bryant.
Why do I love this book? [...Read More] Read more
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If there was one book that really changed the way I felt about being a parent and the way I am raising my children, it is How To Teach Your Baby To Read, by Glenn Doman. This book introduced me to the genius that is inherent in every child and how to provide an environment to awaken and nurture that genius. I feel more engaged as a parent, and my kids love it, too. This is a must read for any parent who wants more than just average for their children. Click here to get your copy today!
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